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It Ain't Half Hot Mum

Series 5

Original Broadcast Date : 25/10 - 29/11/1977

Produced by David Croft, Episodes 2 - 5 Directed by Ray Butt, Episodes 1 & 6 Directed by David Croft.

Episode 1 : "Front Line Entertainers"

The Concert Party are moved nearer the front line, in the jungle. They come to an old camp recently vacated by the Australians, or so they think. The Australians come back as they have lost one of their troops a few weeks before and cannot go without him. It is decided that the way to get him back is to lure him back by putting a "woman" in the jungle to entice him. They pick Gunner Mackintosh, who at the best of times is no oil painting...

Episode 2 : "Bridge Over The River Hipong"

Gunner Parkins takes a morse code message and gets it wrong. He thinks the message was for the Concert Party to build a bridge over the River Hipong, so that urgent medical supplies can be taken over the river. After toiling for a couple of days, the bridge is finished, only to discover that the message was for a "fridge", not a bridge.

Episode 3 : "The Pay Off"

The chaps from the Concert Party are given the job of delivering a bribe to the local bandits to stop them from causing trouble for the British Garrison. The bandits want the men to do a show. They find the bandits have a lot of rifles and decide to take a piece out of each gun, so they cannot be used. They use Lofty's costume to smuggle them out, but they have to cross the river and Lofty is so heavy he starts to sink in the mud.

Episode 4 : "Puddings From Heaven"

The men, bored with their diet, decide to get the RAF to drop some food parcels, by dressing in some white saris and making a large white cross in a jungle clearing. The RAF fly over and drop 2 cases of food, which contain nothing but Christmas puddings with the name of a Brigadier or General on them. The men eat some of the puddings, but discover that GHQ want them back, because they don't want people to know that Generals and Brigadiers are getting special food parcels. A deserting private disguised as an officer takes them away, to sell on the Black Market, but the Concert Party retrieve them and get their audience to eat them.

Episode 5 : "The Superstar"

HQ send the Concert Party a new recruit, but he has to go through an audition. He can sing better than Gunner Sugden, he is a better ventriloquist than Gunner Parkins (which isn't too difficult!), a better pianist than Gunner Graham and to top it all, is a brilliant female impersonator, to Gloria's horror! The men fear they will soon be out of a job and aim to get rid of him by sending him to an audition which was meant for Gloria, after Gloria pretends illness. He gets the job, to the relief of the Concert Party.

Episode 6 : "The Eternal Quadrangle"

Captain Ashwood, Gunner Parkins and Sgt Major Williams have all been seeing the same young Burmese girl in the nearby village. The Colonel refuses to let Gunner Parkin marry the girl when he asks for permission. It is then discovered that Gunner Sugden has also been seeing the girl....

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